my life so far 2014

Had an angel of a daughter in March, truly blessed. I thought being motherly was some life changing event, in a way it was but not the all encompassing way I thought it would be. My husband and I love spending time with our new baby, she males us laugh, and sometimes want to cry. I suppose I thought my 'natural Motherly instincts' would kick in as soon as she was born. Not the case with me, and at first I gave myself a hard time. I thought nursing would come instinctively, thought id have an instant almost ethereal bond. With the addition of residual pain after giving birth, hormone rollercoaster, I should have eased up on my expectations of myself. Our baby is happy, healthy, and loves us no matter what; just as we fell for her at first sight. So if anyone reads this and has had similar feeling as a first time parent, try not to put so much pressure on yourselves. Another new event is that I finally got the courage to put some old poems together into a book and self publish on Amazon. I was nervous to put it out there, but my families been amazingly supportive of it. I was inspired to put it out there because I want my daughter to follow her dreams as she grows. Also my younger cousin recently published a book on there, which was a great story (Air & Angels) based on Vampire Diaries. My other cousin who was not only a gifted writer but also a soul filled with light who just enjoyed making others laugh passed away far too young this year while I was almost due to have my baby. All these people helped me, and where its easy and free to self-publish its not simple for me to get ast the 'should I' stage. in other baby news I'm also blessed to have some of my best friends pregnant or recent moms themselves, seeing them so happy makes brings joy to all around them. Although I should mention my girlfriends who don't have kids yet are so supportive and still visit and hang out with me, I mean why wouldn't they right? But I've heard stories about how new moms ditch their friends sometimes or vice versa, sad to think about. It really does mean the world to know such a good group of people.